Sunday, February 27, 2011

superfluous post made up of lists:

emcees people might be surprised i like:

- kanye west
- jay-z
- freeway
- kool g rap
- tupac
- m.o.p.

last four books i bought:

- point omega by don delillo
- an object of beauty by steve martin
- chronic city by jonathan lethem
- freedom by jonathan franzen

music i've been listening to a lot lately:

- bad time zoo by sims
- "something in the water" by prince
- "bosico" by aesop rock
- "death 9000 (prof & p.o.s. broadcasting version)" by mux mool
- "radio-inactive" by blueprint
- wooden heart by listener
- "demon girl" by cecil otter

stuff i used to not really like that now i like quite a bit:

- kefir
- asparagus
- gingham
- a close(ish) shaved face
- writing lyrics
- boots (but not my ugly lugz)
- guru's
- the national
- twitter
- short hair
- showers in the morning
- going to work on time

i feel like this list may grow much longer over the coming months

i think my depressing posts are more interesting. too bad for you, i guess.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

reasons i might be gay (by no way a comprehensive list):

i decided to finish of my night by
-listening and loudly singing along to erasure
-watching pushing daisies

reasons i might be awesome (by no way a comprehensive list):

i decided to finish off my night by
-listening and loudly singing along to erasure
-watching pushing daisies

dear twitter,

stop being broken and over capacity.
i just have one stupid thing i want to say.
don't be so stubborn.
you know i love you.

apt aperture


dear twitter,

thanks. i knew you would understand.

loves and smooches,
apt amplifier

Friday, February 25, 2011

as you all know, dear readers, this blog most often focuses on my mopey, whiny, melancholy, etc. side. but today i though i should put up a post that focuses on a different side of me. my vain side. (which, truth be told, is probably at least a little related to my mopey, whiny, blah blah blah side).

so, fine people who read my blog, i just want you to know that

i look freaking good tonight.


on an unrelated note,
twin shadow radio on pandora
kills it.
go listen.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

things i should have done tonight:

- taxes
- wrote lyrics
- made a poster
- postcards (hahahahahahaaahahahahaahahhaahaaa... but really, those might happen someday... right?)
- cleaned my room
- cleaned my bathroom
- been social

things i actually did tonight:

- made and ate hdmc
- watched pushing daisies on netflix
- texted
- posted upcoming shows on the apt facebook page
- ate a krispy kreme donut
- listened to music

i'm feeling pretty good about my choices.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

today started out bad.
and then got good.
thank you to the people that helped make it good.
maybe i can do this more often.

from a text conversation last night:

"i don't get it either. but there it is. and there it will always be. ready to occasionally suckerpunch me in the face. and make me bleed green."

so, not only do i write in vague, ridiculous metaphors, i talk in them also.
that's why my friends love me.
so pretentious.

and, yet, kind of awesome.

it's amazing the things that can completely derail me.
i probably won't even leave my bed today.
what a joke.

that was the word.
so very apt.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

the birds on the wires sing so desperately:

sims - when it rolls in

something to strive towards, i suppose.

let's make a deal:

i'd glady wear this
red face

if it meant
my heart went

my head is a
better place
to keep my

Friday, February 18, 2011

three and a half unrelated things:

beats. beats. beats.
i need more beats.
i feel like i could finish 2-4 new songs over the next month if i had the proper beats.
guess i should finally force myself to learn to make them myself.

i don't like that i get nervous when i am coming home.
ah well.
i suppose it's just another step closer to the scythe. these are the sort of things you find on that path.

buys sims' new album bad time zoo. it is so good.
in fact, buy all doomtree related products that you can find.

Monday, February 14, 2011

holidays valentine's reverse (sort of):

wrote this one precisely on valentine's
sitting back, watching all these people pantomime
proving how their love, fooling on some dove shit
but i'll just keep to myself on these back nine
never gonna get that birdie, never really push that worldly
my love is so much more quiet and hotter burning
it's not a pop song, hollow and glittering

just some stuff that popped into my head at work.
supposed to work its way towards more positive.
not gonna finish it.
cause who needs another verse about valentines.

sometimes it feel just like time travel.
she's back to the sidekick method.
but she's mistaken the roles.
i hope she enjoyed the intermission.

there are some nights when my left shoulder feels painfully empty. my left arm won't just fall asleep by itself. where will i get the tingles of a dead hand awakening now? where will i find such plain proof of blood flow? sometimes i wonder if those nights of half-sleep energized me more than any amount of r.e.m. now i can only visit in my dreams. haunted slumber. and, sometimes, when the night's light comes through the window at just the right angle, i can feel the weight of a phantom body on my lonely limb. then the white noise of the fan blows it all away.
and i realize where i am.
and when it is.
and my empty shoulder calls out in that unmistakable, deafening sound of silence.
and there i wait.
the most prime of odd numbers.

love song of the day:

andre 3000 - happy valentine's day

Sunday, February 13, 2011

walking through the woods
i got a mouthful
of briers.

get the pliers.
we need to
pull out
this speak.

a (very) short story:

"there are some days when there is nothing i miss more than our conversations," he said.
silence was the reply.
because he was alone.

love song of the day:

mac lethal - unfinished love song thing

Saturday, February 12, 2011

tonight i feel broken.

tomorrow i will draft some new blueprints.
on some frank gehry, zaha hadid, frank lloyd wright, i.m. pei, renzo piano genius type stuff.
get in on the ground floor.

Friday, February 11, 2011

love song of the day:

cannibal ox - the f word

a (very) short story:

"i miss those days of possibility with you," he said.
she replied, "i miss when things were normal."
"maybe neither time ever actually existed," he thought.

love song of the day:

brother ali - prince charming

Thursday, February 10, 2011

ain't no magic in the breakdown, baby:

there must be some sort of
hidden passageway that
i can't see.

i've never been
much of an
escape artist.

love song of the day:

sage francis - rewrite (50 ways) live

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

alright, everyone, put on your game face. it's time to pretend we aren't all slowly melting inside. get dressed to the nines to hide the hive. pretend that building crescendo isn't ominous. pretend it's the sound of you humming to yourself.
smile for the blade.

this isn't so great, but i wrote it so i guess i'll post it.

he had an unusual number of visitors that night. they came from his broken past. and from impossible futures. one after another. a polite parade of specters. they told him what he did wrong. they told him what he would do wrong. they told him stories of times long gone and times that will never manifest. they brought him gifts. they taught him that sometimes having hope is the worst thing he could possibly do. they talked to him of memories. they talked to him of choices. they talk to him of lies and half-truths and things left unsaid. they joked and rebuked. they reminisced and predicted. one by one they sat across from him. and one by one, in their own time, they ceded their position to the next visitor. one by one he listened and wished them well on their way. knowing that, soon enough, they would visit again. and he would receive them cordially. as ever.

love song of the day:

el-p - t.o.j.

Tuesday, February 08, 2011

untitled (time kills all moons)


my oh my
how the
times do change.

now i love
how the
makes the
photos fade.


his heart
at the sight
of every
blue sedan,

and the site
of every
time capsule.

now that the show is done, i suppose i could probably resume posting here on a more regular basis.

and since it's february, the month of all things love, why not a nice series of bitter (lack of?) love songs and some poems/pieces/phrases/whatever that i have been holding off posting for one reason or another? and maybe even the return of the (very) short story.

p.o.s. - that one

Sunday, February 06, 2011

that ended up real nice.

and i am looking forward to not thinking about my own music for at least a few days.

Tuesday, February 01, 2011

get down:

eyelids flip open, shake off sleep's shackles /
shower, brush, dress, climb deep into that saddle /
she arises early to get the fires burning /
she tripped at higher learning but keeps the tires turning /
part-time pays the bills, she'd rather play with hues /
she paints in blues cause the shades match her moods /
she has the attitude it's hobby at best /
she gets confused when they say they are impressed /
always an apologist, no pride, she swallows it /
they can't follow it, she's blind to her accomplishments /
they have a list, she's good at these things /
it doesn't seem to matter, she still bleeds green /
she doesn't put herself out, too filled with doubt /
afraid she's gonna stumble into a case of foot in mouth /
she's so tired of coming up odd numbered /
stumbling on blunders and sometimes she wonders /
if she's too damaged from the last crooked tooth smile /
to move past all her acid and loose bile /
they always take something away and leave trinkets /
happened so often, it's all that she's thinking /
they all fall for the same wolves in sheep suits /
she'll just blend in, smiling back cheap toothed /
forever stuck in those training wheel days /
she's not alone, seems that's the story of the age /

and with that, the last of the lyrics needed for saturday's show are complete. now to memorize and practice my ass off.